No-ga

Okay, fuck it. I'll never be a yoga queen. I just feel completely uncoordinated and geeky. If I do it at home, I don't know if I'm doing it right, if I take a class, I feel like I'm the only one sweating while trying to stand up straight.

Last summer, I finally got into a work-out routine and although I didn't shed much of my extra cargo, I was leaner and stronger than I have been in a long time. And at the gym, I didn't feel as out of place on the treadmill or using the weight machines. You don't have to rely much on coordination and I have been walking for quite a few years now.

I quit the gym to save some money and because I thought working out was creating my back pain, but it's not going away. So I figure, if I'm going to be in pain, I can at least lose some pudge. Painful and pudgy or painful and pudge-free? YMCA - here I come... again.

I thought that when I finally quit drinking the weight would melt away. I mean, I was drinking some serious empty calories. Like many that have gone before me, I realized the strong allure of chocolate. I've always been a compulsive eater, but sugar has never really been the problem. Carbs, salt, fat - that's my heroin baby. Now I'm faced with giving up sweets - specifically chocolate, or any kind of candy substance. I think I can handle frozen yogurt or popsicles, ( she says tentatively) but for now, I need to cut out sweets and see where I stand.